If You Feel This…
Since I have lost 160 lbs, the things that people feel free to say
now, that they would not say when I was 349 lbs have gotten to me.
So I came up with this poem to express how I feel.
Hey girl you sure look good!
Oh I didn’t before, as you thought I should?
You always had such a pretty face!
So the rest of me was such a disgrace?
Now the truth that lay deep in their hearts,
Begin to show up, in whole and in part.
Oh my God, you were so dang fat!
Do you think it hurts any less because I look like this and not like
that?
Yeah, oh yeah I wanted a change,
I took deadly steps so you would look at me the same.
You ignored my thoughts and discounted my words,
Because you saw me as a beast and my words were like herds
Of cows or horses or even whales.
The way I looked was because you thought I had no will because, I
failed.
But oh yeah now the scene is flipped,
You want me, you need me, and now you tip
You hat to me on a sunny day,
But 10 months ago you would laugh and turn away.
The same heart that was under that meat
Has not changed and continues to beat,
Faster, and faster in a crowded room.
But now you accept me, but before I brought gloom.
Well forget you now, more so now than then,
What you wouldn’t say before, but will say now still slices thin.
Into my heart, which they did not remove,
Just the 160 lbs of fat you hated and disapproved.
These are just me thoughts, and helps me get through when people say
things like ‘now you are presentable’, what does that mean. If it
encourages you, please let it bless your heart.
Zenna Sanders
349/191