15 months out !
Hi everyone! I haven’t posted in a while. I have been reading the
posts and I can see that I’m not alone with fear of eating the wrong
foods or not getting the exercise in. I go to a therapist every 2
weeks since before the surgery to work on the food issues and it is
emotional for me. I’ve always loved food, I always will! I miss the
chocolate cake and New York Cheesecake and I especially miss the Tom
and Jerry’s ice cream, but that’s life! My problem has been that
I’ve also been getting hungrier. It seems that the more carbs you
eat, which also has more sugar, makes you hungrier. I realized that
I’m not getting in as much protein as I’m eating out of emotions
again. I hope this isn’t off subject, because it has to do with my
surgery; does anyone else find that having a relationship after a few
months of having surgery, that the person ends up not understanding
how you could have been so fat in the first place. I’ve lost 167 lbs
total, I was 406 at the start, and am 237 now. I am 5′7 and blonde
with green eyes, I am told I’m very pretty. I feel attractive
enough. But my boyfriend, who I met 4 months after surgery say’s now
that he’s not use to being with a “Big” woman and that this may be
causing our sexual problems. I know its not me, but, I guess I do
wonder how he could think that way. I had so much trouble finding
the right man when I was fat because they either wanted me to gain
weight or lose weight “their way!”. I gave up dating for 10 years.
I just started again last year. This is so hard. I have tried to
feel good about my weight loss and feel “normal” even though I still
have 50 - 70 lbs to lose. I work out 3 days a week now, hoping it
will get better. My therapist thinks he’s wrong for me. I think so
too, but I’ve gotten dependent. I see him too much. I don’t have a
lot of friends and I know I need to reach out more. I’m just scare
if I stay with him, I’ll gain weight. I just wondered if there is
anyone out there who understands this or has had this experience. I
don’t want to give up on having a good and right relationship, I was
hoping I would finally meet someone who was truly in love with me and
loved my looks too. Maybe I’m dreaming! But hope is still there!
Thanks for listening. I really appreciate what everyone is going
thorough and I know for me it is back to doing the protein, drinking
water and trying to talk and write this problem out so that I can
think more clearly. I love the weight I’ve lost and I’m grateful for
the health I now have. Blessings to us all!
SunTara